I turn 32 years old this month. While I wish that I learned life lessons sooner and had a grounded man to mentor me growing up, I would not entirely change my life for the journey made me the man I am today and gave me a greater appreciation for life as a whole.
Here are 32 lessons I believe men must know to live a rich and fulfilling life:
- Men must lead the relationship. Keep the ‘kilig’ (butterfly) feelings going each day and remember why you love her in the first place.
- Women don’t function well when men don’t care. Jokingly telling her that she is somewhat attractive will get her attention.
- “Shortcuts to a woman are long cuts to my life.” – Patrice O’Neal
- There are no shortcuts to successful relationships. Be the rock she holds onto by being patient, a great listener, and understanding her dreams and fears. She will reward you with her love.
- When women sarcastically tell me that my corny jokes are not funny, they are OBVIOUSLY interested.
- It is okay to be Single as a man in his 30s. The tide starts shifting in our favor as men.
- Women don’t love men so much for their looks, but rather for their “mind” – how he reacts to adversity, what he dreams of and is working towards, and most of all, how can he help bring her to her “highest self”. Of course, being a good-looking guy like myself also helps 😉
- Learn to be happy doing things for yourself. Your happiness is paramount. This happiness trickles down in attracting the right women in your life, who will want to be part of it and will enhance the happiness already in your own life.
- Adobo tastes better than white meat 😉
- “Well, it is what it is. You gotta figure it out. There’s no other alternative.” – Michael Jordan’s advice to Kobe Bryant on leading the Lakers
- The excuses will always be there as to why we do not have what we want in life. Not having a father growing up. Not having the strongest allies and male role models growing up. Not having enough money to have everything I want. What matters is what happens next. “What are you going to do about it?” Most people will dismiss this question and go back to their lives, blaming others for their circumstances. Few will take responsibility by giving challenging endeavors their best efforts and live with the results. The latter works out better in the long term.
- If you do not have a problem in your life, then you have a problem.
- There is no systemic racism. Just professional victimhood enabled by the lack of personal responsibility and lack of fathers being held accountable to raise their children.
- The quality of people in a person’s life is in direct proportion to his/her self-confidence.
- Do not be afraid to challenge your long-held beliefs and lose relationships along the way.
- Our long-held beliefs, known as invisible scripts, can hinder us from growing if we hold on to them too tightly, so be open to different perspectives!
- Do not trust communists.
- We mourn for the loss of loved ones mainly because of the regrets we have for not spending more time with them.
- We make our lives short by taking life’s opportunities for granted and by not “scraping the meat off the bone” off those opportunities. By applying the lessons learned from those who have passed away, they will live on.
- Make at least one person laugh each day and embrace the corniness. We now call Task #143 at work the “I Love You Task”.
- Betting on yourself works out better than betting on others. Be your best self, not a shittier version of somebody else.
- Not settling does not lead to a peaceful life, but rather, leads to a more fulfilling life in the long term.
- Take care of yourself first, then don’t forget to take care of those who matter most to you once your needs are met.
- We are only entitled to our labor, not the fruits of our labor. The work itself is the actual reward, not the money or accolades earned.
- Having a practical skill that pays well while not having debt beats masquerading as a professional with an impractical degree attached to their LinkedIn profile, drowning in debt.
- It is not about narrative and what people think. It is about delivering results and letting those speak on your behalf, while not being afraid to talk about your results if necessary.
- Someone funny in my life once said, “A Masters (degree)? Master-BATE!”
- The three qualities of being Rich in God’s Eyes are generosity, service, and stewardship. You will be disappointed for your generosity, service, and stewardship not being appreciated at times, but that should not stop you from living a Rich Life.
- Doing so cultivates a mindset of abundance, knowing that what we share will come back in some ways we do not expect.
- Using our gifts and skills to serve others is the only way to cultivate them. We’d cheat ourselves and others for not using those gifts and skills to their fullest.
- There is no perfect time to go on a journey. Ready, Fire, then Aim!
- Trust your instincts and Muses that something great will happen. Writing code. Writing corny and informative articles. Sending flirty and cringeworthy texts. Respect the game and the game will respect you.
- Turn the money dials down on things I don’t care about (such as alcohol and golf clubs) and turn the money dials up on things I care about (such as fresh and high-quality food, and travel).
- When meeting people, do not ask, “Will this person like me?” Rather…ask, “Will I like this person?” Doing so puts you in a position of strength, not seeking the validation and approval of others.
- Appeal to people’s interests, not morals. Be genuinely curious about them and sincerely compliment them. Then, ask them for help or a favor 😊
- Be petty and silently laugh at the misfortunes of people who wronged you in the past. Then, say a prayer for them and work on bettering yourself and living in the present moment.
- Do not get even. Live life to the fullest the best way you can and let your happiness speak volumes.
- That 4-Series is a lot more fun to drive than the Corolla. That Sport Mode go BRRRRRR!!!
- Of course, have fun in the process each day! That’s why that goofy picture is the cover photo!