First off, Noy Sauce would like to say: Happy Thanksgiving!
It has been four months since I last made a post in the Noy Sauce blog. Many things had happened in that time frame (reviewing for the GMAT exam, moving back to a very familiar place, and taking care of family), all of which forced me to put writing for the blog on the backburner.
I have not lost sight of why I created the blog in the first place. In fact, I have ideas on what to do with the Noy Sauce blog moving forward that I’d like to share:
- Add a new section dedicated to reflections I have been writing for my prayer group the past four years. I plan on posting in this section at least once a month. The name of this new section will, of course, be corny.
- Post thoughts on being unemployed, and enjoying the ride.
- Publish a (currently ongoing) mult-part series on my journey to graduate school.
Now back to my post for you all!
For as long as I can remember, the day after Thanksgiving Day, known as the Thanksgiving Holiday, was a day my family would wake up early in the morning to drive an hour to the outlet shopping center in order to find deals on clothing and shoes. Thanksgiving Holiday would later become known in popular culture as Black Friday over the years, because that day was considered to be the busiest day of the year for shopping. Ten years ago, retailers took Black Friday to whole another level by opening their stores on the evening of Thanksgiving. What was supposed to be a day spent with family ended up being cut short by shopping.
When my family heard about this hype ten years ago, my mother, cousins, and I naively drove one hour to the outlet shopping center on the midnight of Black Friday. This local event became known as “Midnight Madness”. We spent close to one hour looking for parking at an overflow parking lot, walked twenty minutes to the shopping center, and waited in lines inside and outside of the stores that lasted another hour just to get 25-40% off the purchase. By the time the sun came up six hours later, we were all exhausted to the point that we can barely keep ourselves awake.
Over the years following Midnight Madness, my mother and I went to the outlet early in the mornings of Black Friday, because most of the shoppers who came during midnight had already left to go home. However, during the past five years that I had lived in the East Coast, I did not drive to the outlet shopping center during Black Friday, but rather, stayed home and purchased items online if a deal was too good to pass up.
This year, my approach to the Thanksgiving Weekend changed. After weeks of transitioning my move back to the West Coast, listening to the rhetoric of the presidential election, and taking care of my family, I rediscovered that expressing gratitude not only makes us happy, but also helps put matters into perspective. I often wrote in the Noy Sauce blog about the importance of expressing gratitude, but easily forgot what I had reflected on because of everyday life challenges clouding those lessons learned. Everyday life challenges included planning the logistics of my move, such as letting go of my furniture and car, and packing up my belongings, all of which at times made me lose sight of what I had accomplished up to that point. Listening to the arguments being tossed around during the presidential election and later finding out the results, made me feel restless on what the next four years would look like. Taking care of my mother, who experienced a setback in her recovery from an illness, made me question the doctors taking care of her after they prescribed her one medication after another.
Like any challenge we face in life, the problems do not instantly go away. Otherwise, we’d be perfect by now, life would be too easy, and Noy Sauce would have no reason to write this blog. Rather than instantly go way, problems require a process that involves perseverance and optimism that somehow, someway, life will get better, no matter how shitty a situation is in that moment. This process is what fosters personal growth and maturity, both of which can be used as stepping stones to become better versions of ourselves.
When going through my transition in moving, I had to be open to unexpected changes in my plans. However, I failed miserably towards the end of the moving process when I chewed out the customer service representative for the delayed delivery of my shipping container. After complaining over the phone for five minutes, I told myself, “Noy Sauce, you messed up in controlling your emotions. Move on and do a better job in being patient with others next time.” As I moved box after box from the shipping container after the container belatedly arrived, I expressed gratitude at my younger self for those times I spent running on the outdoor trails and lifting weights at the gym, regardless of the weather and time of year. The added physical strength gave me the endurance to move all my belongings from the shipping container to the apartment in four hours without any help. The confidence that I can do things without much help gave me an appreciation for my younger self putting in the work to be in great shape.
When I heard the results of the presidential election a few weeks ago, I had trouble sleeping that night, because of the circumstances that led to that moment. Reading more news did not help, because the headlines fed off my fear of uncertainty. After speaking with my aunt, I remembered that our country is run by a system of checks and balances, in which that system prevents one branch of the government from having too much power. I abstained from facebook for a week, letting the mostly useless political posts slide past my news feed, and focused on more important matters that I have control of. I realized that this is not a time for us to complain (and not do anything to improve our own situations—something that I tragically see on a regular basis), but rather to take action in striving to become better versions of ourselves. People around us are looking for hope, but we can be that hope that those around us are looking for. What can we do? Be proactive instead of reactive when dealing with life’s challenges. Serve the community or local nonprofit organization. Be kind to those we encounter. Let go of our pride to love and pray for our friends and family, even when it hurts. I look back at the blessings I had in my life, such as earning a college education without getting into debt and travelling abroad without a visa, and found that being born and raised in a country that has blessed me with so much, regardless of who is leading the country, are blessings in of itself.
When my mother experienced a setback in her recovery from an illness, my patience was tested as I drove my mother to doctor appointments, and listened to her doctors make recommendations on what steps she should take next. I rolled my eyes in annoyance when the doctors prescribed my mother more medication, thinking that all they do is “practice” the medications and their effects on her. If the doctors are supposed to be the experts in treating illnesses, why do they need to practice treating the symptoms instead of treating the illness itself? Is this how the medical community got the term “medical practice”? Do they perform o-“pera”-tions simply to make more pera*? Once I somewhat got past making backhanded jokes about medical practitioners, I found gratitude for the chance to take care of my mother and to spend time with her, after being away from home for five years. Instead of thinking of this particular experience as a burden, I thought of the time spent with my mother as “practice” for married life when it comes to laying down my life for my future spouse. My mother’s recovery is a process, and I am confident that she will recover from her current ailments. She is still alive, and to me, that is all what matters.
When going through experiences that challenge and test our resolve, it is easy to lose patience and sight of what lies ahead. We get frustrated and restless because reality does not meet our own expectations. Yet, through an act of expressing gratitude, we slowly but surely, trade expectation for appreciation. Appreciation quells our frustrations and restlessness, because we find peace on what is in front of us. Instead of wanting something we do not have, we want the things that we already do have. Our accomplishments. Our friends and family. Above all, our lives. And what would we have to give in order to find peace for the moment and 100% off frivolous material purchases? A simple act of gratitude, of course!
Happy Thanksgiving Day!
* “pera” is the Tagalog word for money. If you pronounce the word operation in its Filipino translation, operasyon, you will get the pun. Gosh, I love such corny jokes!