In a previous post, I had lamented on the struggles of finding a job and coming into peace for my current life situations for what they are. When self-imposed expectations were not met, I often gave into frustration, talking negatively of other people and holding onto bitterness inside my heart. I mostly fell off the grid in social media following my last post in the Noy Sauce blog, abstaining from logging into my facebook and only checking my Snapchat once a week. During those three weeks, I immersed myself in completing computer programming exercises and assignments, voraciously reading books at a rapid pace, and committing myself to prayer and exercise. Like all changes to our habits and ways, time is needed, so that doing the routines with as little as thinking as possible becomes the norm.

My friend introduced me to author Steven Pressfield’s second non-fiction book, “Turning Pro”, after introducing me to “The War of Art” a few weeks before. Picking up where he left off in “The War of Art”, Pressfield bluntly tells the reader that turning Pro is nothing but deliberate practice in doing the work, filled with misery. Misery provides the sustenance that keeps us going, because we have reached the point where there is no other choice but to do the work. Our biggest enemy is the Resistance that lives within us, preventing us from doing the work needed. We often distract ourselves by checking e-mail and social media, and mindlessly browsing the internet, putting off the work needed to take the next step in our own growth. When one turns Pro, that person leaves the life they once lived. The Pro experiences an epiphany that feels like hell, because self-delusion is stripped away in order for truth to replace it.

Two weeks ago, I turned Pro. By shunning social media, and doing work that needs to be done, feelings of jealousy and envy have mostly subsided. Immersing in doing the work to somehow make myself better each day replaced wasting time looking at content that for the most part, did not improve my well-being. No one is happy all the time, and what is shared in social media is a highlight reel that masks our insecurities, imperfections, and lowlights. This is not to say that I am 100% anti-social media. Social media is an effective tool that helps me keep in touch with certain friends and family, in which a phone call, text message, or e-mail are not as effective. The key is to not let that tool make a tool out of me.

A week into shunning social media, words of wisdom I often read became more concrete. For example, Aristotle said, “The best way to avoid envy is to deserve the success you get.” At first, Aristotle’s quote did not make sense to me. After all, aren’t we all entitled to the success we get in life? However, upon doing the work and making sure that I do not get in my own way, I realized that reaching success is difficult. Everyone’s definition of success changes, and as someone who holds himself to a high-standard, my definition of success seemed elusive. By realizing the journey of reaching that next level of success, whatever that may be, is difficult, the journey becomes easier. This realization forces me to not take shortcuts in the process, to humble myself each day, and to quietly enjoy the process when no one else is looking. As one immerses himself in doing the work during the journey, feelings of envy go away because we are striving for a fulfillment that goes beyond comparing ourselves to others. Our hearts know that we deserve better than what we already have, and we will focus our energies in striving to be the people we are meant to be, instead of reading a posts that are less than 140 characters long.

I rediscovered my passion in software engineering through spending hours in trial-and-error, experimenting which CSS attribute looks most aesthetically-pleasing on my web browser. My head hurt like hell, as I saved the CSS file and refreshed my HTML page each time I made a change. I rediscovered my passion in reading, spending three hours each day and an hour every evening, making connections with previous experiences to build my own set of mental models. Lastly, I took another step in my prayer life by leading the rosary. Being focused in prayer through leading put me in a presence of mind that put all of my worries to the side, unlike the numerous times my mind wandered as a spectator in prayer and in mass.

When we lay down our expectations and focus on the present, something magical happens that surprises us. In my case, two to three different companies have been contacting me each week, expressing interest of an opportunity for me to work for them. A month-long project has been given to me, in which I am given free reign to figure out a solution. A potential business opportunity has been presented to me. I booked a vacation that gives me something to look forward to, after those times I gave into frustrations and later immersed in doing the work. Turning Pro is humbling, because plenty of self-reflection and belated appreciation on how many variables involved in my life that had to go right for me to get where I am today. The best way to express my belated appreciation is to strive to be the person I am meant to be, hoping that those around me will do the same. With such division and gloom-and-doom portrayed in the media, the best things we can do are limiting our exposure to news and focusing each day in our lifelong battle with the Resistance that resides within us. It is only fitting we give back, otherwise we’d not only be cheating others of our gifts, but we’d also be cheating ourselves from becoming the people we are meant to be. After all, we each have a purpose in this world that gives us the opportunity to make the world better than it was before we came here.